2009!

Happy New Year!:)

I didn't manage to pen down my reflections on 2008, and my hopes for 2009 before the new year had started.

So I will do just that.

All in all, I must say that I've been very satisfied with 2008. Perhaps my most significant achievement was my exam results, which, to be honest, weren't great anyway - but it marked the capabilities of my mental capacity. It really did feel as if the hard work paid off - and that feeling of satisfaction and a sense of achievement was truly immeasurable. Secondary to this would be the internship which I (though not painstakingly) secured just before Christmas! It serves as somewhat a pat on the back for the arduous efforts I put in for applications. While I know I am not the best student/ candidate, it gives me some confidence in believing that I am the one in like a hundred people that they were precisely looking for. The pressure comes later as to how I perform and live up to expectations. For the meantime, I yearn to gloat in solitude for as long I can afford to. For it gives me comfort through the days which I find hard to through ahead.

It was not a smooth journey all the way. Not everything had turned out the way I had planned. I didn't get everything I had wished for. Not everything worked in my favour. Perhaps I'm not thinking as hard as I should (or maybe its because it's already 1.30am...), but I can't seem to recall any detrimental, stumbling blocks, hindering my path.

I have learnt lots in the past year. I've learnt that nothing comes easy, and that sometimes you need to put in 110% to yield a mere 60% - but you've still got to do it. I've learnt that you need to push yourself as the going gets tough - and presevere. Hold your head high up when it seems impossible. I've learnt that somethings can't be wished for - and that could be for very good reasons. I've learnt that you can't assume one's intention - because one's mind is more complicated that you think it is. Most importantly, I've learnt that you can't change who you are. A very important lesson to learn. I've been searching and experiencing all that I could within the past 3 years - perhaps to find a definition of who I am, what I want. And I realised that although my interests may alter with the flow of time, my core values remain untouched. I still hold strong to my believes and ethics. As time passes by, I know that I will learn more and more about myself - a never ending process. But maybe I know and always had known my inner-self. And I am satisfied and content with who I am today. Hence, I must concede, it had been a good year for me.

Prospectively, I don't know what 2009 will bring. My resolutions still stand as similar as the past years have been. That aside, I pray to be more courageous when confronted with situations - that I will stand on my ground and face what is to come. As ever, I hope that this would be a fruitful year and that I will improve from last year - in terms of academic and career opportunities. Some things are not within my control, but I am determined to give it my best shot. And, as with all human beings, I want to be a better person. For myself and the people I treasure the most. Ultimately, I want to be happy. And I want those around me to be happy as well.

With all the challenges and tribulations ahead of me, 2009, I'm ready!!